Over the last several years, a collective of activists-survivors formed Breaking Code Silence (https://www.breakingcodesilence.net/). What started slowly, with survivors writing in their stories and denouncing abuses in the Troubled Teen Industry, has become a massive online movement of adults FINALLY coming forward, with allegations and stories dating to the 1980s. 

THE LONG-LASTING EFFECTS OF CHILDHOOD TRAUMA AND INTERNALIZED GAS LIGHTING

Many of us have been reluctant to come forward, as having been interned in a program carries its own form of stigma. We learn, early on, no one can understand, no one believes us, and so we quit talking about it. Our silence allows Makana Leadership to operate today.  As adults and parents, we would never accept anyone treating our children the way we were treated at Cedar Ridge or Makana Leadership or Makana Outreach--especially in the midst of a global pandemic?! Their arrogance and lack of social responsibility seems to respect no limits. 

See Jen Robison’s interview with the Salt Lake Tribute, September 2020 here: https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=328295501595953&extid=cTk9aIMtoMZ3j4qc 

#BREAKING CODE SILENCE

In September 2020, we decided to collectively speak up and publicly “out ourselves” for the first time. Some of us have made signs as part of the national #BreakingCodeSilence campaign. 

By coming out, we’ve come to the greater realization that we were not “bad kids” or “troubled youth,” like they told us. We were sent away and punished for arbitrary reasons. In PM’s this week and group discussions, we’ve heard all manner of ridiculous reasons that kids were punished and sent to Cedar Ridge: 

• “Rachel” was punished for being “too childish” (she was 14 years old)
• “Sasha” was punished for “smiling too much” 
• No one understood why “Mary” was there at all, as she was only 13 years old (and stopped wanting to go to school due to period problems). 
• A frequent pattern, which will be the subject of an upcoming post, is failed adoptions and failed parenting. Why not let your child emancipate him/herself rather than send them to child abusers? Would they not be better off? 

We, as adult survivors of Cedar Ridge, reiterate our stance. No human being, regardless of age, deserves to be punished and subjected to the humiliating regime that robbed us of our youth, our dignity, and our ability to trust ourselves and others. 

Over the last weeks, our inboxes have been flooded with testimonials of serious abuse allegations at Cedar Ridge/Makana Leadership/Makana Outreach. As mentioned in  the homepage, what we do know and what we remember, as harmful as it was, is sadly, ONLY THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG. 

NEXT STEPS:

• We commit to developing tools for survivors of Cedar Ridge Academy and Makana Leadership or Makana Outreach to report abuse. We will systematically track cases of sexual assault, violent restraint, and physical injuries. 

Why? This week, we heard from an adult female survivor who had been pulled aside during a medical examination in college. Her doctor asked whether she was the victim of child abuse. She bore the traces: multiple broken bones and strained ligaments that had not healed properly. She was obviously neglected. In Cedar Ridge, we were systematically denied medical care. This is absolutely UNACCEPTABLE. 

• We promise to systematically track the premature deaths of our peers due to suicides, overdoses, domestic violence, and/or lengthy sentences in the criminal justice system. 

Why? We cannot and should not forget our loved ones. They should not be written off as mere “deaths of despair.” As adult survivors, we have all struggled with our mental health. After all: who among us hasn’t contemplated suicide? Who hasn’t tried or hoped to end it all? We were brainwashed to believe we were worthless, that our families wanted to rid themselves of us. 

• Finally, we commit to working with UnBroken and other national organizations to connect Cedar Ridge and Makana Outreach or Makana Leadership Academy (or whatever the hell they are pretending to be!) obtain the trauma-informed counseling and legal representation they deserve FREE OF COST. 

Check out their website and resources here: https://unbroken-survivors.com/information 

CONCLUSION

We are engaged and enraged. It is our responsibility to help children and adults process and recognize the deep harms that Cedar Ridge and Makana have done to them. Over the last week, what was once a small group of supportive survivors has attracted new members. One wrote:

 “I’M SO GRATEFUL FOR THE WORK YOUR ALL DOING. ALL THESE YEARS, I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST ME. I LEGIT THOUGHT I WAS ALONE IN ALL THIS SHIT ALL THESE YEARS. EVERYONE ALWAYS SAID TO JUST GROW UP AND MOVE ON. BUT IT HASN’T BEEN SO EASY.” 

We promise to be tireless in this effort because we love you, we see you, we hear you. 

#ISeeYouSurvivor

#BreakingCodeSilence

#UnBroken

#MakanaOutreach

#MakanaLeadershipAcademy

#CedarRidge